same old same old
we have just got back from a visit to my dad and his wife. this is his third wife so i don't call her my step mum. his second wife, who brought me up, is my step mum.
my dad looked better than he did last time. he is 80 years old and for someone who spent a large part of his life trying to end it, he has survived remarkably well.
his wife was in something of a state. as soon as we could get a moment away she told me that, when she had gone to see her grandchildren, my dad had rung a woman they know and asked her round. this woman was a friend of my dad's wife so rather than going round she had told my dad to act his age and told my dad's wife what had happened. my dad's wife had told him he was below contempt and that she would divorce him. to which, true to form, he had said that she was having an affair and that this justified what he had done. his evidence for the affair was that when he was in hospital last, having had a stroke, he had seen her emerging from behind the curtains crying, with a doctor.
my dad also said that, if she did divorce him he would kill himself. regular readers will know my dad's history. my dad's wife said that if he killed himself she would not come to his funeral and neither would i. she may have been wrong here. i might just have had enough of covering up for my parents and might just be tempted to go along and let rip.
anyway, she has not divorced him and he has so far not killed himself. i had thought the times of dreading the phone ringing had maybe subsided. but maybe they haven't. however i am a lot tougher now and i have other priorities. at the end of the day i have never been important enough to stop my dad killing himself and i doubt that much has changed.
so i wait and see...
my dad looked better than he did last time. he is 80 years old and for someone who spent a large part of his life trying to end it, he has survived remarkably well.
his wife was in something of a state. as soon as we could get a moment away she told me that, when she had gone to see her grandchildren, my dad had rung a woman they know and asked her round. this woman was a friend of my dad's wife so rather than going round she had told my dad to act his age and told my dad's wife what had happened. my dad's wife had told him he was below contempt and that she would divorce him. to which, true to form, he had said that she was having an affair and that this justified what he had done. his evidence for the affair was that when he was in hospital last, having had a stroke, he had seen her emerging from behind the curtains crying, with a doctor.
my dad also said that, if she did divorce him he would kill himself. regular readers will know my dad's history. my dad's wife said that if he killed himself she would not come to his funeral and neither would i. she may have been wrong here. i might just have had enough of covering up for my parents and might just be tempted to go along and let rip.
anyway, she has not divorced him and he has so far not killed himself. i had thought the times of dreading the phone ringing had maybe subsided. but maybe they haven't. however i am a lot tougher now and i have other priorities. at the end of the day i have never been important enough to stop my dad killing himself and i doubt that much has changed.
so i wait and see...
posted by mafalda's daughter at 8:47 pm
2 Comments:
Oh....what a waiting game that is. But these things are what they are and in a way they either build us up to be bigger and stronger or rip us to shreds. And sometimes a little of both.
I hope peace finds your father.
Life does suck right now. My father's idle threat was "I'm leaving, I'm going to the Island to be with my family." who, it should be noted he didn't particularly like.
If your father has made it to 80 without killing himself, I'd say his threats are quite idle.
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